I am in this world of all things mom through several Facebook groups. These groups are meant for giving information, advice and encouragement throughout this wild ride of raising little humans. Now don’t get me wrong, there is plenty of that in these groups… I am forever thankful for the world-wide-web during times of needing instant answers on weird questions such as- “Will anyone else’s toddler eat anything besides Mac-N-Cheese?” or “Who else has a three-nager telling them they will go to Walmart by themselves?” It can be extremely helpful and encouraging during these instances, but I have also noticed a terrible trend within these groups as well. The D R A M A.
Recently, a post caught my eye on my feed and just sort of rubbed me wrong. It is what led me here to share a few thoughts of my own on the matter. To briefly sum it up- a mom in the group asked if other people felt the same on this topic:
“Parents posting anything outside of the lives of their children on social media made them look like bad parents (basically assuming that they cared more about themselves and less about their children).”
It was more so asked in the form of a question, which I’m assuming would allow more validation on the matter, rather than just being posted as an attack. Now, of course this basically sparked World-War Mom. The comments began flooding in and many mamas came to the defense stating that to assume such a thought was inappropriate and out of line. I’ll keep it G-Rated and leave out the details on what I really read. While I must admit, I spent far too long scrolling through the comments, I did not feel it necessary to chip in my two cents. Which is why I am here, sharing my thoughts through my own platform.
Of course I have my own opinion on it… I will openly admit that I do not agree with a statement that’s basically saying a mother who posts ONLY photos of her children is a better parent than one who does not. Rather than getting extremely worked up over it, I kind of just chuckle at the assumption. Although I do share plenty of photos of Ken, I guess I too would fall into the category of a “bad parent” because I also share photos of my life outside of the M-O-M gig.
Now that we’ve got the back-story, here’s the problem that I would really like to address from this topic. In a world of new difficulties we’ve never experienced before (parenting), we need all of the support we can get. These sweet babies we are blessed with do not come with handbooks and we certainly face challenges that are unexpected and that we are untrained for. What we need is not Mom A vs Mom B, and what I mean by this is: organic mom vs fast food mom, or crib sleep mom vs co-sleep mom, or in the sake of this post, picture-sharing mom vs BAD mom– but just MOMS TRYING TO COMPLETE THE SAME TASKS AT HAND. We’re all just here trying to ensure that our small humans are raised happily and healthily. We should encourage one another on this duty by joining together to help each other out.
If you knew that you had a rock solid support system beneath you, beside you, and all around you, you would feel confident that you were doing your best. In the duties that come from motherhood, that’s what matters most. Wouldn’t it feel so good to know that you could wake up everyday surrounded by encouragement in an already stressful day-to-day life rather than adding to the chaos through useless drama? I sure think so.
Let’s work on our attitudes, mind-sets and hearts. Lord knows we could just use a little more love. I mean, that is technically what we’re called to do. Let’s make a promise to one another that we will try. We’re going to have opinions, we’re going to feel differently than others on different aspects of life, but we can at least make an effort to be kind and have good intentions. I’ll start with me.